Little Things: Wedding Dinner

I used to like attending wedding dinners when I was young because I get to wear pretty dresses & at one point in time, boyish outfits. I get to watch singers sing on stage thou I felf sad for them having to sing to an audience who are more interested in the food or talking than his/her singing. I remember there was once where I was 'traumatised' when my family coerced me to go on stage to sing my idol 江玲's song. It became one of the jokes of my life till today...Those were the days when wedding dinners were held at restaurants where wedding favours were fruit cakes, which I think serve a practical purpose since dinners start very late in those days.

Slowly, wedding dinners moved into the hotels. Live music was replaced with soft music & photo collages with video footage. Hard liquor was not as popular as beer & red wine & wedding favours have changed to chocolates & later, to bears, key chains, photo frames etc. But what remains pretty much the same are the march-ins, fan-fare for the 1st dish, cake cutting, champaign pouring & yam-sengs.

The significance of wedding dinner took a different stance when I had my own. It's an art trying to figure out the best seating arrangement. A can't sit with B, B must sit with C, D request not to sit with the boss etc. Who to be seated at the 'Red Table' was also one of the headaches. This was the time I realised that love does not just involve 'the 2 of us'. It's just not possible to please everyone. I also succumbed to my grandma who insisted on having sharksfin for dinner. For the sake of my in-laws who were not physically mobile & some practical reasons, I decided to do away with the champaign toasting. I even tried to arrange for a 'singles' table to create opportunities for new friendships. But thanks to the last minute decision of my relatives...my well-thought out seating arrangement was almost ruined.

Knowing the amount of work (& the amount of cash) that goes behind the wedding dinner, I have since then, been more proactive in my RSVP to wedding invitations. Looking at the video footages, I could feel the joy & happiness of the couples, their family members together with their friends & relatives. & I'm always touched to see shots of parents hugging their daughters (so far yet to see any sons who have hugged their parents). So attending a wedding dinner is not just which hotel/restaurant, how much to give for the angbao, whether the food is good etc. To me, it's a reminder of the significance of a marriage & appreciating the blessings given by the people around you.

Had attended my relative's wedding dinner held at Restaurant 88 last Sat & it was a memorable one partly because it seemed like a mini family gathering for us. Never mind if we laugh loudly at our own jokes, never mind if we pass the dishes to each other, never mind if my grandpa spoke a little louder as he was high on red wine. Everyone is genuinely happy & in the joyous mood.

We joked, commented on how each other look since they made extra effort to look good. Made fun of each other, took photos with my aunts' cameras. They even managed to make the bride's parents to take a loving shot :) & bargained on how much to charge each other for taking this photo. Let me try to get it uploaded soon.

It was a time of catching up. It's been weeks that I've met them & though still the similar faces, I felt
time has really made significant changes. My cousins have grown so fast that I felt time seemed to have stopped at the time when they were just kiddies. They are now already towering over me...On the other hand, time has also left its trail on my grandparents, aunts & uncles.

Of course I was bombarded with the 'usual question' of 'when's my turn for a baby'. Now I can understand the stress faced by those childless couples. But hey, I suppose I don't need to avoid such functions just to avoid those questions. Perhaps a good way would be to think of various unique answers to their questions =)